Boys need love too.

It’s a shame that society has – in some ways – taught us that men can’t show emotion; socialisation has taught men that bottling everything up is essentially the only way to keep it moving, which in turn has led to men and boys finding other, unhealthy forms of therapy.

As I’ve mentioned before, African households are not, (generally speaking), households which are open to conversations surrounding mental health and most definitely not open to conversations surrounding the mental health of black men and boys. From experience and observation, this dismissal of discussion can very often mean that men don’t feel it safe for them to express their feelings towards something or someone without the fear of being judged or criticised for being too ‘sensitive’. I feel as though the Black community are often very quick to dismiss any real conversation about Black men and mental health and a lot of the time I find that incorrect assumptions are made before any progression for conceptualisation – if any progression is even made.

As someone with two black brothers, I really wish for them to be able to talk to someone about what’s going on in their minds and express themselves by any means necessary and do so in such a way that they can feel better and judgement-free after having done so. I don’t have the most serious of relationships with either of them but really and truly from the bottom of my heart, if either of you are reading this, a nigga loves you FORREAL.

We need to unteach ourselves that talking about men’s mental health is “gay” or “soft” because it shouldn’t be this way. Men shouldn’t have to look to a bottle for therapy or develop unhealthy coping mechanisms because society has told us that men seeking help is weak. Granted, attitudes towards men and mental health are positively progressing, however there is still such a long way to go in terms of creating safe environments for men to get the help that they need.

This is just a polite reminder to check on your bredrins and to let yourself feel how you feel. You don’t have to hold it down all the time.

Comments

BLM GON' NEED MORE PRESS

When Cardi B said, ‘bitches be pressed’, she wasn’t mf lying. Bitches be PRESSED, but bitches be pressed about the wrong things. Since the BLM has caught serious media attention, and the racists have been exposing themselves, I’ve noticed that people really don’t like it when they aren't met with silence. Everyday why is it race relations but did you check yourself before you wrecked yourself? Black lives really rattle people, inject iiiittttttttt !!!! People don’t like it when you don't comply with ignorance. People don’t like talking about racism because man "dont see colour". People don’t like it when Black and Brown people are talking about the never-ending oppression that we’ve had to endure through no choice of our own because “we’re not our ancestors”. All this ignorance and complacency brings me to re-introduce the town I live in and the obtuseness it’s almost always escorted by. This town has a very prominent community page on Facebook which is mostly us

You go Glen Coco !

I recently stumbled upon a tweet that said “being insecure is a waste of youth, nobody is above you”; which in more ways than one has led me to evaluate just how far I’ve come in terms of self-love and self-appreciation. As aforementioned in previous blog posts, I have had a hard time coming to love the skin that I am in and acknowledging parts of myself that I have previously not thought of in a positive light. I do find that sometimes you can’t win; I mean that in terms of being confident versus not being so confident. I personally think people want to be mean about something/someone before they can say something nice and even then, more time it’s backhanded. We all have insecurities, but it’s just some are better at hiding them than others. Shoutout to my mum and sister for always backing a brother even when my self-esteem was in the gutter. Learning to love myself has been quite the journey if I do say so myself, but I have learnt and, in some ways, come to terms with the fact

It is what it is.

It is what it is. Shit happens and then you die, but what matters is how you live your live in between. Sometimes shit hurts, sometimes we lose people, sometimes we can smile about the small things in life. It hurts to lose friends, break up with your significant other or coming to terms with things you thought you’d never have to deal with. In some ways what’s most painful is that it’s inevitable; it’s part of growing pains. Eventually we all learn to live without the people we thought we could never live without. We meet new people who make up for the pain we once felt. I try and find lessons in everything that happens to me because as I've learnt in this life, I can't come and kill myself for things I can't change. I know sometimes nature just naturally runs its course and you grow out of doing certain things and or people and eventually God will put new things and new people in place of the past, but it doesn’t mean it’s any less painful or difficult to move on fr

LINDIWE

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